These are random text messages that I have sent or received, intentionally left anonymous to protect the guilty: Note to self. Do not reserve your name at a restaurant as “Hitler”. Mmmmm, nothing says hawt like welts on your penis. I’m told to not be manly right now. The DJ here reminds me of the [...]
These are random text messages that I have sent or received, intentionally left anonymous to protect the guilty: Holy wtf, I just killed a bear That’s awesome, I just found a cargo ship for sale for $700k There are two people sitting on my lap. Search for halo sex or weightlifting on youtube, it’s awesome. [...]
These are random text messages that I have sent or received, intentionally left anonymous to protect the guilty: Jezuz, I shouldn’t be txting in front of a giant vagina. The guac was good, the people were bad. Join the Lemon Party —- for freedom. The yeti penis. I may or may not have just commited [...]
This is the first installment of the “Text Message Hall of Fame”. I’ll attempt to remember to post these occasionally. These are random text messages that I have sent or received, intentionally left anonymous to protect the guilty: Free as in lots of beer Can you txt me your bank acct #? I just have [...]
